- Personal Effectiveness Tips
Some ways to build even more momentum in your life:
- Make sure you always retain a flexible approach to anything you pursue. If you hurry through life with but one plan of attack, you'll find that most of the time, you'll be thwarted. Stay focused on your goals, but be flexible with how you approach them.
- If you cannot laugh at how ridiculous you are (at times), you've got serious problems. Make sure you have a sense of humor, and use it freely on yourself. At worst, you'll make others feel better about themselves when in your presence!
- Push yourself towards discomfort every once in awhile to ensure that you are growing as a person. If you are comfortable, you're not learning new things, and you're not expanding your experiential world as you should be.
- Stop tripping over the trivial on your way to a fantastic life. Too many people spend too much time worrying about small and minute details that really have very little relevance in the big picture on their way to achieving their goals. The next time you find yourself fretting over something, stop and ask yourself if the issue is one that directly (and adversely) affects your achievement of a high priority goal in your life. If the answer is "no," move on.
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- Thoughts From a Madman
"Joe Frazier is so ugly that he should donate his face to the US Bureau of Wild Life"
Muhammad Ali
- Reality Check - Death by Guilt
Years ago, I made a conscious decision to stop allowing others to make me feel guilty. Like most people, I grew up hearing the guilt-laden messages that friends and family preach, such as:
- "Shame on you!"
- "Wait till your father gets home!"
- "Eat your peas. Somewhere, a kid is starving!"
- "You should be ashamed of yourself for doing/thinking that!"
Guilt is a toxic emotion, but if you look at it differently, you can use it as a tool for self-improvement. The only time you'll ever feel guilt is when you break your own rules of personal conduct. For example, if one of your rules of conduct is that you place friends and family ahead of career, and then you make a choice one day to forego dinner plans with friends in order to stay late at the office and impress your boss, then you will feel guilty.
If you are experiencing guilt on a daily basis, you need to do one of two things: Change your code of conduct rules, or change your behavioral habits. The first requires more profound cognitive changes, the second, more behavioral discipline. Either are effective ways to allow you to stop experiencing the feeling of guilt.
Stop acting like everyone else a special ability to control your emotional state. You alone are responsible for your emotional state. As a result, nobody can "guilt trip" you without your explicit permission.
Free yourself from the toxic consequences of guilt by being intentional about setting your own personal code of conduct. This determines the quality of your character, which in turn affects the quality of your relationships with others. If you believe your code and personal ethics are already set to your highest standards, then you need to simply stop sabotaging yourself by making terrible situational choices. By doing either, you'll find that the "emotional" weight you carry with you on this journey called life is much lighter.
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